India Trip - Day 4 - Gholvad

Damn mosquitoes. And this is after lathering Odomos (smelly cream you slap on your skin to discourage the bugs), lighting Kachua (smoky thing you burn all night to ward off bugs) and a Good Night mat (see Kachua sans smoke).

Was abandoned by Mum this morning. She shoved off to some other temple or something. Lots of religion in these parts. Wandered around aimlessly on the terrace since heard reports of rats running around biting people in the living room at night. Figured the terrace would be safe since no place for rats to hide.

Was kidnapped by the people across the street and taken to drink neera - some date palm tree secretion thing - very sweet, quite refreshing. Have been bamboozled into eating lunch at neighbour's. Have had 2 breakfasts already. Getting quite fed up of being so fed up.

Mala mami (mother's cousin's wife) just declared that she doesn't believe in insurance and Bipin Bhai (neighbour) wants me to drink neem juice (smelly green tree) to clear off my spots. Have tried to tell him that I don't have spots and that these are mosquito bites but he seems quite convinced that I have a skin condition. Unfortunately it was Maharashtrian New Year yesterday and somebody's deposited gallons of the stuff at our front door. Hai Maalik.

Must feign weakness and stay in bed all day. No wait, that won't work. They'll feed me more! Oo, could pretend to have diahrrea. Unfortunately am fit as a fiddle. Couldn't possibly be healthier. Rosy cheeks and all that. Suggested going for a walk to the beach but was greeted by horrified screechings of "dhoop mein kaise chalogi?!" (it's too hot and sunny to walk outside). Everybody's completely convinced that since am so fair that am going to melt the minute I step out of the house.

Went to Mr. and Mrs. Contractor's house for dinner. Yes, that is their actual name. He's a horticulturist and they've got a lovely garden full of exotic tropical plants. Sat next to a Swami (religious man) at dinner and it was all I could do not to hit him with a thali (round steel plate you eat in - no fine china here).